The importance of separation

I had a fabulous weekend.

As did my fiance.

We spent time with people we love.

And did things we love.

Michael had his Bachelor weekend in Miami and enjoyed some fancy dinners, nights out on the town, and college football ("It's all about the U!").

Me? I indulged in a little introversion (movies, wine, and kitty love) and had a very intimate Bridal Shower.

It was perfect. 

And it got me to thinking...

Ruh-roh!  

Thinking?!?!

Oh no!

LOL.

All joking aside ... it got me to thinking about how important it is in a relationship for both partners to do their own thing. To be themselves. To have their independence.

There are many ways we are different. Many ways we compliment each other. And we need to allow space for those parts to breathe.

I am not at all into football. I didn't go to a college football town so it was never part of my social culture. And I never lived in one place (let alone one country!), so I didn't develop an attachment to my "state" team. 

Michael? HUGE Miami Canes fan! I joke that I don't think he will change the wallpaper on his cell phone or computer until we have children. Maybe once we're married, but I'm not counting on it. For him it's Miami ALL THE TIME. Because he loves it. 

And that's OK.

This is my take on it:

I own this shirt. LOL!

Me? I love music. I love musicals. I get ALL geeked out about music stuff. Michael jokes that if there's classical music playing in the background anywhere (movie soundtrack, elevator, train station, department store), I will be sure to tell him exactly what it is. And then get super excited and geeked out about it and tell him everything he needs to know about that piece of music or chord progression we happened to hear. 

There are many other ways that we are different, which I won't bore you with, but I realize how important those differences are.

Because you don't want to marry a version of yourself, right?

And doing your own thing is important. Hanging out with your girlfriends/guy friends, IS important.

He and I have both been in relationships where we were made to feel bad about doing such things. Co-dependence I think they call it? Not fun.

"To be in relationship, interdependence is the way, not independence or dependency." ~Micki McWade

Did I miss him? Of course. And I'm glad he's home. But I'd be lying if I didn't admit to enjoying this time on my own.

And it makes this time together even more meaningful and special. 

Interdependence is key. Autonomy is important. Separation is a good thing. Going off and doing your own thing ... a must. 

So go do that.

Oh, and today's back workout:

Do what makes you happy.

Especially on your own.