"The bad news is time flies..."

"...The good news is you're the pilot."

~Michael Altshuler

I swear the school year just started. 

And then it was well underway.

Rosh Hashana. Yom Kippur. (I'm getting into the groove with the Fall Jewish holidays...)

Halloween.

Thanksgiving.

Hanukkah.

And now Christmas.

I feel like once Halloween hits, everything goes by in the blink of an eye!

And the New Year is quickly upon us. 

I tend to get pretty reflective around this time of year, thinking about the past year, things I want to do and accomplish in the upcoming year. 

This past year has been pretty spectacular. You can get a glimpse of that in my more recent blog posts here and here.

2018 was very good to me. 

But 2019 has much in store as well.

We just started a kitchen renovation which is bound to take longer than expected. (At least everyone who has been through any type of renovation continues to warn us of this -- LOL!) Michael and I are both super excited to complete this amazing project. The kitchen of my his dreams. It makes me happy when he's happy. 🙂 

All the entertaining and parties we will finally be able to host...very exciting!

I can't help but think about the other things that are in store for me/us in the new year. The things yet to explore and do. 

Believe it or not, I've actually tried to ease up on my intense goal setting. 

You know, like complete an Ironman (a goal I set back in 2008 and completed in 2009).

Or do a bodybuilding competition (another goal I set in 2013 and completed later that year).

Or learn Rachmaninov's 3rd Piano Concerto (a goal I set in 2015 and completed early in 2016). 

LOL.

I want to do things less intense.

Like read more. 

I am considering a Book Challenge. Like 52 Books in 52 Weeks.

Well, maybe I should start with with 24 books a year. 

52 books might be overly ambitious considering I've never done that before. We'll see.

But I want to read fun stuff. Things I wouldn't normally read.

Fitness-wise, I'm not planning to do any bodybuilding competitions (though people keep asking). I want to keep up with my strength training but I also want to try things I have never done before.

Like rock climbing.

Or AcroYoga.

Those both sound super fun to me. 

I might do another piano recital. Perhaps. We'll see.

I'm sure Michael and I will find another exciting place to travel to over the summer (people keep asking about that).

And expanding the current Rosenberg household. (I'm thankful people don't continuously ask about that! LOL!)

Because Facebook predicted it ... 

(I'm sure that's solely based on the fact that my profile picture is of me in my wedding dress...ha!)

Whatever 2019 brings, I'm sure it will be amazing. And I'm sure I will look back a year from now and think to myself, "Gee, where did the time go?"

"The most beautiful moments always seemed to accelerate and slip beyond one’s grasp just when you want to hold onto them for as long as possible.” 

~ E.A. Bucchianeri, Brushstrokes of a Gadfly

Do what makes you happy.

First year of marriage: A reflection

Michael and I celebrated our one year wedding anniversary a week ago. 

I still can’t believe one year has gone by since we said our "I dos" to each other. 

And what a year it has been!

We honeymooned in Portugal.

Sold our condo.

Bought a house.

Spent 6 weeks in Australia & New Zealand.

And just started a kitchen renovation.

We have been through a lot of stress-invoking situations (buying/selling a house, travel, spending lots of money...LOL!) but survived it…with grace. 

And the reality is, we've only known each other for 3 years. We had been together 2 years and a day by the time we got married. So there are still things we are learning about each other. All the little habits. The day-to-day stuff that no one else gets to see.

As I reflect upon why this has been working so well (because it truly has!), here are a few things that come to mind that I feel are contributing to our continued wedded bliss:

1. Do stuff together. Be active. Travel.

We both LOVE traveling and take every opportunity we can to explore new places. Both of us having a teacher's schedule certainly has its perks! I love bonding over the experiences we have when we travel, whether it be internationally or domestically. But whatever it is we are doing, whether it be travel or lounging around watching Netflix and drinking wine, our relationship is at its best when we have that quality time. 

2. Do stuff apart.

This is also super important. For both of us. But for Mrs. Introvert over here, I replenish best when I am alone. As much as I love my husband, sometimes I just don't want to talk (to anyone!) and need peace and quiet. At the same time, we still keep up with the things we used to do before we met. I think that is equally important, if not more so at times. You don't have to do everything together. A sense of autonomy and being "you" outside of the relationship is so so important. And healthy.

3. Keep your traditions. Have rituals.

One of our long-standing dating rituals was (and still is) "date night". We spent weekends together and chose one night during the week to have date night so we could see each other. And we still keep up with that tradition. It's a great way to reconnect in the middle of the week and also ensures that we get that quality time together. Because there is always "stuff" to do that can get in the way of spending time together.

4. Share responsibilities.

For our 3rd date, my husband invited me over to his place to cook me dinner. He admits that he was trying to impress me that night. And he absolutely did. But I came away from it thinking “I will never cook for this man. Ever.” And I haven’t. LOL! He cooks, I clean. That’s our “deal”. Though we help each other out with the cleaning (we are home owners now!) and other responsibilities.

5. Hang out with people whose presence both you and your partner mutually enjoy and respect. 

Find your marriage tribe. The people you both enjoy hanging out with. Whether it's a group of friends or other couple friends you can double date with. There's nothing like surrounding yourself with people who love and care for you both and respect the commitment you've made to each other. 

6. Talk about stuff.

Make sure you have an open line of communication. My husband will openly admit that I am a little better at bringing stuff up if something is bothering me (this has taken me years of lesson-learning through mistakes!). Though my one downfall is timing. I'm not always the best at that. LOL. But our open communication and ability to talk about anything and feel supported is what has kept our connection so strong. Those uncomfortable conversations. Talking about how we feel and why we feel that way (without blame or finger pointing) has continued to strengthen our bond and bring us closer together. 

7. Laugh. Be silly.

My husband is very silly. Sillier than I am. But in his eyes I am quite weird. So we laugh. A LOT. With each other. At each other. It keeps things light and easy. Even in the serious moments.

8. Take care of yourself. Take care of each other. 

In order for you to be your best for your spouse, you need to take care of you first. Again, not always my forte, but something I am getting better at. And he can read me so well now. A perfect example: he knows that a packed weekend full of social commitments will leave me feeling depleted rather than replenished. So we find a nice balance of socializing and “doing nothing-ness” which leaves Mr. Extrovert and Mrs. Introvert happy and balanced.

Love is ever evolving. I can’t wait to see what our second year of marriage brings! 

Do what makes you happy.